Tuesday, November 01, 2005

feeling hopeful

Yesterday morning, my wife and I met with our public school resource for trying to get Zach help in his speech and social development. We met with the school asst. principal, pre-school teacher, speech therapist, school psychologist and occupational therapist. They have all done observations of Zach either in our home or at their school and gave us their reports and recomendations. I was pretty amazed at their level of personal attention, the 1st time in this process that we felt that. We walked away feeling like this was a team effort between them as educators and us as parents. Everybody in the room had concern for Zach and were committed to unlocking his intelligence. As an educator myself, I much prefer the paradigm of personal education to the sterile/impersonal medical field.

Zach qualified for special ed. IEP pre-school which means we don't pay anything. He will begin most likely on Monday, 4 days a week starting at one hour a day and working his way up to 2 1/2 hours per day. They will be personally helping him develop his speech and communication skills, as well as his ability to be in groups and submitt to adult imposed structures. The structure will be VERY new for him and will undoubtedly cause him some stress. But given the fact that we have time and now resources, we feel very hopeful.

If your the praying type, pray for Zach's transition to this structured enviorment. Pray that as he learns to communicate better, the world will be less limited to him and thus less stressful. That he gains confidence with new skills and that confidence unlocks the intelligence that is within him. We're looking long-term and believe in God's story for Zach.

You see, I spent over 20 years of my life with little to no relationship with my earthly father. Even now, it consists of about 2-3 phone calls a year. Growing up, there were multitudes of nights where I cried myself to sleep and would talk out loud to a God that I wasn't even sure existed. I would say that if I ever had a son someday, I would make things different. Being a father is very personal to me, its a cherished role. One of my life goals was to experience a father-son relationship first-hand. Growing up, I coveted my friend's relationships who had Dad at home. I threw myself (anger and all) into sports and found my whole identity there. But no matter how many home runs I hit, points I scored, or tackles I made, the game would end and I would go home alone. Nobody there to see me play, nobody to enjoy it with and I lost interest. At 18, I transferred that ambition to ministry success. While I hope it was helpful to the Kingdom, I found myself at 26 empty and feeling alone as well. That's when I had my ABBA experience, a resting in the arms of my heavenly Daddy.

Now I can rest in the fact that I have 3 amazing children, a community of faith that I journey with that has loved me over and over and a ministry to a multitude of other lost sheep that need the same direction/attention I needed in that awkward time known as the teenage years.

I don't understand of a life outside of the hope of a Kingdom come. God is good.


1 comment:

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