There's a reason that I haven't blogged in a bit, been in a spiritual funk. There are some things happening around me that have and are absolutely breaking my heart. I have a dear friend peddling at the table of the Enemy and I have to let him go. I don't want to, i care so deeply for him, but I cannot affirm the choices. I have spent a lot of time being very angry and feeling betrayed, but not tonight. Tonight I weep. Tonight I long for a turning in his heart. Tonight I want Easter Sunday but all I have is the darkness of a cross. I pray for him with all my soul and it hurts.
Tomorrow morning I will run the Thanksgiving Day 10k race in downtown Cincy for the 4th year in a row. Well, run is a bit of a stretch, I will run/walk. I am trained for perhaps 2.5 miles, but not 6.2 so it will be a total push and have to walk out the distance. I do it 1) to earn my turkey and 2) to remember losses in my life. My niece who passed 3 years ago, my brothers in Christ I lost to death, my brothers in life who have turned from Christ to the table of the enemy, I grieve all of them. I don't just grieve though, I also receive grace upon myself and I receive hope that for every brother lost to the enemy that I will pray for and go after 10 more for the Kingdom of God. I am very sad this year but I look forward to a time of painful reflection.
Give thanks in the light and give thanks in the dark, his mercies are new every morning. I've been beaten down but I don't accept defeat. Resurrection is always shining through. In loss there is always gain somewhere. May the Glory of his Grace fall upon us and make us whole. Don't give up on us, God! May your Kingdom come on earth as it is in heaven.
peace to your times of giving thanks and remember my friends, don't ever give up.