Tuesday, April 13, 2004

I find that in vacations and time away, if I take the time to be available and to listen, God always speaks. But never in the way that I wished he would or not in getting a pat on the back, he often gives me marching orders and warnings. It usually requires me to cut out yet another sin in my life for holiness. Or to own up to some mistakes that I have left dormant. Or to consider new areas of spiritual responsibilities. Its never, "well done, go on to eternal peace". I guess that will have to wait for a different kind of vacation :)
I had a vivid dream of the demonic realm about midweek. I was in a holding room with a door on the other end. I was face to face with a demonic spirit and it seemed like we had met before. Fear and anxiety made my heart race. I confronted the Spirit as it headed through the only door in the room. My confrontation had no effect. It was apparent that where it was going, I had no access to. I demanded that it be stopped but it just sneered at me and laughed. It was going to prey on something or someone and I couldn't stop it or protect. I was denied access. As it slipped through the door, I was left alone and felt helpless but also with a sense that it was meant to be. I woke up pretty startled as if this wasn't a dream but a real confrontation in the spiritual realm. I'm not sure what it all means, but I know that it happened. God does not always reveal to us what we want, but rather what we need to know. This is a hard lesson.

"You take us by the hand and lead us, not there were we would wish to go, but there where it is best for us to be." April 13, Finan Reading of Celtic Daily Prayer.

peace to you this day,

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