Sunday, December 25, 2005

Christmas is rough

As the shock is wearing off, the grief is increasing. Having to wait until Tuesday to get some closure is kind of difficult. Atleast for me, my feelings are getting more raw. The loss just hurts. There is no sense in it and frankly, I'm tired of hearing people trying to find logic in it. For me, it doesn't help, doesn't make anything feel any better. We have to deal with the fact that our world is broken, it doesn't work right. We have no real control. All sense of control is illusionary.

I'm still congested from my illness last week which is messing w/ my head constantly. I feel fatigued and exhausted. I can't imagine how Becky and Rob feel. I'm hoping for strength and wisdom for Tuesday's funeral.


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